ICYMI: "8 Things You Shouldn't Say to Someone with Breast Cancer"

Courtesy of Mary Ann Wasil Nilan and the July 2011 Get In Touch Foundation Newsletter

The perfect time to revisit...8 things you should NOT say to someone with breast cancer    

1.  How bad is it?  WHY?  Um...well, for obvious reasons. 

2.  Never leave an e-mail, voice message or text asking questions....ANY questions.  WHY?  Because...yours is probably not the only one that day, and it is just too exhausting (emotionally and physically) to answer everyone - no matter how much we would like to, and no matter how much we appreciate your concern.

3.  Never tell them what YOU want to do to help them.  WHY?  Trust me, what YOU need to do to feel better is probably not what your friend needs to feel better.

4.  What's your prognosis?  WHY?  Sheesh.  Let's try this instead..."what's your protocol?"  Much easier to answer, especially if your friend is too unsure, frightened, unprepared (or all of the above) to discuss what the possible outcome of her cancer might be.

5.  At least you caught it early.  WHY?  Because your idea of early might not be her oncologist's idea of early.

6.  At least it's only breast cancer - it could be worse.  WHY?  Okay, really...do I need to explain this one?

7.  PLEASE don't ever tell us about someone you know who died from breast cancer.  WHY?  Again, for obvious reasons...but, really...it only scares us more than you could ever know - and we know that's not what you want to do.

8.  This too shall pass...there's life after breast cancer.  WHY?  Well, for one, there's life right in the middle of breast cancer; and it just may not pass for anyone dealing with a late-stage-diagnosis. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is...words matter...please choose yours carefully.